


I'm Right Here

by Cefhclwords



Category: Men's Football RPF
Genre: Appendicitis, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Injury, M/M, eric dier injury
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-10
Updated: 2019-11-10
Packaged: 2021-01-26 22:02:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,775
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21381295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cefhclwords/pseuds/Cefhclwords
Summary: Eric has been taken down by illness and injury, and after he seems to be unable to recover from his appendectomy, he is feeling hopeless and sad. Dele is there, even on the bad days.
Relationships: Dele Alli/Eric Dier
Comments: 8
Kudos: 61





	I'm Right Here

**Author's Note:**

> HI babies!!! I hope you're doing well!! This was unexpected, but Um I read that Eric Dier article about his struggles after his surgery and that had my mind running and I needed to write some comfort fic for my heart. This kinda spilled out and was way longer than I expected but I really really hope you enjoy it and I would adore to know what you think <3 any comments or kudos mean more than you could known :)

Dele knows before he’s even fully awake that today is a bad day. It’s sort of been like that since Eric’s appendix ruptured. Good days and bad days. There was by no means an even split of good and bad, maybe more often than not they were good days, really. But the bad days were bad and seemed to last three times as long as the good ones. It didn’t seem to be enough awful luck that Eric had ruptured appendix and a post-surgical infection that needed three rounds of antibiotics to cure; apparently Eric needed to suffer even more. His immune system hadn’t been the same since the appendectomy and the effects ranged from exhaustion to getting a new cold every week, to migraines and aching muscles. There were even the occasional fever and faint or dizzy spells. 

It was only early still, the light only just having peeked up over the horizon, setting a soft grey backdrop to the steadily falling rain. A crack of thunder stumbles lazily across the air, a threat of a lightning storm brewing a few kilometres away, ready to roll over to them later in the day. Dele thought maybe it was odd that he knew it was a bad day for Eric before the other man was even awake. Or maybe, he thought, that’s exactly what he should know now that he and Eric were, well a thing. They’d never explicitly said ‘boyfriend’ yet, but they’d said I love you’s and talked a few times about having a family of their own one day, so Dele didn’t really mind the lack of classic title. The way Eric looked at him, how he’d introduced him to his family with a glowing smile and their hands tangled, how he kissed him like it was the first time every time, that was more than enough for Dele. 

It was the way Eric was sleeping that gave him away, in truth. Dele has come to learn, in the myriad of injuries and illnesses that had overcome Eric recently that he had a certain way of soothing himself. When Eric wanted comfort, he’d lay his head on Dele’s stomach, turn his face into his shirt to breath him in, eyes closed. Eric has told him once when they were laid in that position, Dele’s hand gently scratching through Eric’s buzzed hair, that when he was really little his mum used to cuddle him like this. It was something that made him feel protected, at home, and Dele felt lucky to be the one to give Eric that sense of love and safety when he needed it. 

It wasn’t something he did often really, even in the past few months when things were really hard. Only once had Eric done it, the night after his surgery, when Eric was still in hospital he had reached sleeping for Dele, a silent request for him to join Eric on the small bed. After some soft bickering, and Eric asking over and over Dele finally got into the bed very carefully. He stayed perfectly still as Eric had settled against him, carefully curled himself until he could lay his head on Dele’s chest. The movement had brought tears to Dele’s eyes that he was thankful Eric didn’t see. That day had been one of the most terrifying of Dele’s life. Seeing the text message on his phone from Eric’s brother to say that Eric had been rushed to hospital with a burst appendix, it had twisted Dele’s world up, let it fall apart and crumble to pieces. 

The panic that had taken over had been so deep and all-consuming Dele had been on the verge of a panic attack, thankful that he had been on the training ground and had Kane there to talk him down and calm him. It had been Harry that had driven him to the hospital, Dele’s hands shaking the whole way as he prayed under his breath that Eric was okay. 

Dele felt sick to his stomach as he recalled it now, he moved a hand to wrap around the back of Eric’s neck, squeezed firmly and relaxed when he felt his man steady and right there under his hand. Eric was safe, he was okay, and no matter what they faced they would get through it. Dele had him, he’d make sure of it. 

Dele sighed deeply and tugged the rumpled bed covers up so that they were over Eric’s shoulders, smoothed them flat with a slow drag of his hand. He kept it there and slowly began to rub loving circles over the fabric laid across Eric’s back. Yesterday had been a good day by all accounts, Eric had been able to participate in his rehabilitation training and felt pretty normal. He’d gotten a slight headache and body aches last night after his shower but they’d both just brushed it off as him still getting back into condition. Eric had gone two weeks without any cold or fever symptoms and Dele had started to get optimistic about his man being out of the woods. 

It seemed he was wrong to do so, the skin of Eric’s neck has been warm and slightly clammy to the touch, and from how Eric was cuddled into him, he can assume that Eric had woken up a few times during the night and settled back into Dele like that for comfort. It broke Dele’s heart that he hadn’t been awake to soothe him, that Eric had felt awful and he hadn’t been there for him.

Dele exhaled heavily, gazed down at Eric with soft eyes and moved the hand that wasn’t rubbing his back to scratch gently through his hair. Thunder growled overhead and as the rain picked up, hailing down onto their roof and Dele sent out a silent thank you to the universe that they happened to have today off, completely free of any commitments. He absent-mindedly continued to scratch through Eric’s hair, as he quietly planned their day. 

He was in the middle of wondering if he should heat up leftovers for lunch or order that low fat spicy Thai soup that Eric loved, when he felt the boy stir against his stomach. Dele looked down to him quickly, paused the movement of his hand as he watched Eric drag his cheek against the fabric of Dele’s hoodie. He waited a moment, watched carefully in case it was a false alarm and stayed very still. Eric let out a small whisper a moment later, Dele couldn't make it out, but watched the flutter of Eric’s lashes as his eyes open lazily. “Del?” Eric’s words are barely legible, and Dele slid his hand to Eric’s forehead, flipped his hand to rest the back of it against the skin. He quickly moved back to petting through his hair, not wanting Eric to feel smothered by Dele checking on him. 

“Hi baby” Dele said softly, knowing they’d need to take his temperature properly later, with how hot Eric felt to the touch. “How you feeling,” Dele asked after a quiet moment, thunder rolling under his words, a strike of lightning following soon after.

Eric ignored the question, hummed, wrapped his arms around Dele’s waist and tucked his face in closer to Dele’s tummy, eyes closed tight once more. Dele smiled but his stomach twisted, moved both hands to the back of Eric’s neck, thumbs pressed in at the base of his hairline, fingers resting gently on the sides of his neck. Dele slowly began to drag the pressure of his thumbs up in slow repetitive motions, massaging the tension that rested there. He felt Eric rumble out a moan, tightening his hold on Dele as the man continued to massage over the warm skin. 

“Feels good” Eric’s voice was muffled by the fabric of Dele’s hoodie, husky and low with sleep. Dele’s heart clenched painfully and he slowly moved the presses of his thumbs to behind Eric’s ears. He rubbed gently in small circles, felt the skin under his touch erupt in goosebumps. “Head sore?” Dele asked, trying again to figure out exactly what Eric was feeling and how he could help. 

Eric was still for a few moments but then seemed to surrender to the idea he had to answer and nodded shortly. A yawn passed his lips, his shoulders shuffling with the deep inhale. Dele just hummed in reply, met his thumbs at the base of Eric’s neck before he drew them up to the centre of the back of his head, paused there for a moment before he moved to scratch lightly through Eric’s buzzed hair. He used the soft prickle of it to calm himself, to try to distract him from the sick feeling in his chest, a sense of heavy unease that pressed up behind his ribs and threatened to rattle him. 

Dele turned his head to the left and watched the rain pelt down against the window on the left side of the room, Half of their shutters open to let him see the fat drops of water run down the glass. It was soothing and he chased a few particular drops with his eyes, watched them run lazy tracks till they merged together, gaining momentum with the more drops they collected. He chased them till he watched them hit the bottom of the window pain, then turned his focus back on Eric. The man had his eyes shut, and was working his cheek up and down in the smallest nuzzling motion, a small hint of a frown tucked carefully between his brows. Dele sighed softly and moved his hand to drag the pad of his pointer finger between Eric’s eyebrows, soothing away the wrinkle of skin with the touch. He tried to ignore how warm Eric’s skin was under his hand, the light sheen of clammy sweat that was collecting under his touch. 

Eric tilted his head up into Dele’s touch, eyes drowsy and heavy as he blinked open to look up at Dele. He let out a wince as his head tilted back and Dele made sure to not let the worry show on his face. Instead, he gave Eric a soft smile and trailed his finger down the bridge of Eric’s nose, before he drew it back up to his forehead, moved to rub his thumb along Eric’s very faint frown lines. “Body sore?” Dele asked quietly, verbally tiptoeing around Eric explaining how he felt, how bad it was today if they were to expect another cold in the coming week. 

Eric’s eyes saddened and he nodded, blinked twice quickly and Dele gathered his cheek in his palm, rubbed his thumb under Eric’s eye in a soothing motion. “Okay, that’s alright love, had a long day yesterday, m’pretty sore too” Dele said softly, it was only a half-lie. He was sore, muscles stiff like they usually were after a hard training session but he knew Eric had a different kind of ache, the one that made your own skin feel uncomfortable, muscles sore and tender, glands swollen and body heavy. The kind of ache that made your body feel like your bones were reverberating, a hint of the cold or flu that was threatening your immune system. Eric knew the difference though, knew it would be an ache from sickness, not training, but maybe pretending things weren’t too bad would make them a little better right? Dele thought desperately. Maybe if they didn’t dwell on it this would only be a 24hr thing. 

Eric sighed and nodded, tucked his face back into Dele’s stomach, cuddled into him tighter. Dele moved his hand to press his knuckles against the skin between Eric’s shoulders, dug them in and rubbed back and forth in a mimic of a massage. Under his touch, he felt Eric draw in a shuddering breath, “Oh baby” Dele whispered, willed his own eyes not to fill with tears. He felt Eric’s shoulders begin to tremble slightly under his touch and he let out a slow exhale, flattened out his hand and began to rub slow circles over Eric’s back. 

Eric cried often, in truth, teared up at sad movies, got sniffly over sad Christmas adverts, had to wipe at his eyes when his parents left after a visit. It was something Dele adores about him in truth, how in touch Eric was with his emotions, how he wasn’t scared to be sad, to let himself feel things. However it was rare that Eric was properly deeply sad. He was an optimistic person, always looking for the positive to push through, rarely did he left life pull him down hard enough to have him feeling hopeless. Eric crying about his own circumstance, being in tears of hopelessness that had only happened a tiny handful of times in the years of them knowing each other. Dele’s heart felt like it was being rung dry, like someone had taken it in their hand and squeezed and squeezed till it was empty, trying to pump blood that wasn’t there.

“It’s okay amor, I’m right here” Dele mumbled, continued to rub Eric’s back as he heard a soft sniffle from where Eric had firmly hidden his face in the fabric of Dele’s hoodie. As much as Dele wanted to pull Eric up to him, to hold him close and tell him how strong he had been how much Dele loved him and that he would always be there for him, he also knew Eric didn’t want Dele to see him crying like this, there was a reason his face was hidden away, and Dele wanted to respect that. 

After a few minutes the lump in Dele’s throat was so thick he felt like breathing was a labour, Eric’s hands were fisted in Dele’s jumper, his shoulders felt so fragile under Dele’s grip shivering with uneasy breaths. Dele swallowed hard and moved his hand to the back of Eric’s neck, squeezed in a steady pattern. “Do you remember our second date?” Dele asked, not expecting an answer before he continued. 

“I spent like, four weeks planning it right? I wanted it to be perfect. I was so nervous and excited and I wanted it to be perfect. You had planned the best first date and I wanted to show you I could do the same, I wanted to make sure you saw me as Dele someone you are interested in, not just Dele your childish best mate” Dele paused, looked back to the raindrops. 

“I managed to find a Portuguese chef, one that was willing to sign some NDA’s and come over to cook everything for me. I cleaned my house for a full day, bought a new outfit” Dele laughed softly, glad his voice hadn’t wobbled. “Which was ridiculous since we agreed we just wanted a casual dinner because we were both so tired with training, and we just wanted time together more than anything, but I still wanted it to all be perfect” a crack of thunder rumbled loudly and Dele waited for it to pass before he continued. “I couldn’t help it, I was so excited and still kind of in awe that you liked me back I- I felt like one wrong step could ruin it, take it all away from me.” Dele smiled. “Still can’t believe I bought new sweatpants for that date, like you’d ever care about that” he laughed again, remembering how frantic he’d been to make sure he was dressed nicely but still casual enough that it didn’t look like he was trying too hard. He can still remember the exact outfit he’d planned to wear, black well-fitting sweats, and a dark red t-shirt knowing that Eric liked that colour on him. 

“And everything was ready to go, so perfectly set up for that weekend and then I got that terrible cough, you remember? I could barely speak a few words without coughing myself breathless, I was so ill and all I cared about was that our date was going to be ruined, that we had an away game the next week and we were so busy for the rest of the month that we wouldn’t be able to reschedule till almost a month and a half later” Dele said softly, moved his fingers to the top of Eric’s head and lazily ran them over his hair. 

“And it got to the Friday and I was so determined to feel better so we could have our date and I came to training even though I could barely keep up, and you pulled me aside after and you were all angry, saying I should have stayed home”

“And I took it the wrong way because I thought maybe you were happy we had an excuse to cancel the date when I got sick, and I got upset” Dele looked down at his man curled up on top of him, eyes soft as he recounted how Eric had been.

“And you told me that you just wanted me to be okay, that health was first and sometimes timing was the worst. You told me that we can control when we get sick and it’s our body telling us we need rest and that’s okay too. You told me that no matter how my body is feeling, that my mind was strong enough to get me through it, and that I had to let go of the frustration of the bad timing because I couldn’t change it. That I needed to focus on taking care of myself because that’s what my body was saying I needed” dele sighed. “It was hard to hear that and I was annoyed at first, because I couldn’t just get over it, but I knew you were right that I needed to stop being angry about it and instead focus on taking care of myself, that being mad at myself just hurt me more” Dele closed his eyes for a moment, wrapped both arms around Eric’s shoulders and cuddled him into his stomach. 

“And then that weekend you came over anyway, even though I’d all but lost my voice and was grumpy and needy and so tired” Dele smiled at the memory. “You let me half-sleep on you while we watched friends for like six hours and ate leftover noodles from my fridge. At the end of the night, when you’d made sure I was in bed with water and painkillers you said it was the best second date you’d ever had” Dele reached down for one of Eric’s hands, took it in his own and squeezed firmly. “And I asked you why you came to see me when I all gross and sick, and you said that the way you felt about me wasn’t conditional, that you’d be here, sickness or injury” Dele smiled, remembered the thrill that had gone through his stomach at Eric’s words, at how he’d known Eric was it for him since that early on. 

“And I remember thinking I’d I have Eric here with me things can’t be that bad, I’ve got someone to help me” Dele explained. “And I want you to know I’m here too. This sucks, it sucks a lot and I’m not telling you it doesn’t and I’m not saying you can’t be sad about it, you can feel however you want, but I just don’t want you to feel alone. I’m right here and I’m not going anywhere” he sighed. “And I don’t want you to be hopeless or angry with yourself, at the moment your body needs extra rest and care and that’s ok, it won’t be forever- I promise” Dele swallowed hard to fight any shakiness in his voice, glad to feel that Eric’s sniffles had slowed. 

The room was still for a few moments, Dele closed hide eyes and followed the sounds of the storm thundering above them. He counted the seconds between the thunder and lightning, able to see the flashes of light even with his eyes closed. He couldn’t remember if he was supposed to half or double the number of seconds to determine how far away the storm was, so he just stuck to counting the seconds somewhat pointlessly. He didn’t really expect a reply, he wasn’t even sure what he said could change anything, but he felt like he couldn’t just stay silent when Eric felt this way. If he could take the illness off Eric, he knew he would, he would take all of it to give Eric his form back even for just a few games. Dele just wanted Eric to stop hurting. 

Eventually Eric shuffled against him, pulled back from Dele’s stomach and moved up the bed, still he was level with Dele. Dele fluttered his eyes open and turned his head to look across at Eric, his heart constricting painfully when he saw the red of his cheeks and wetness of his eyes. He opened his arms and Eric fit himself into Dele quickly, face pressed close into the curve of his neck. “I love you” Eric’s voice was soft and tired but his words melted Dele’s heart. That Rey was enough for him to know he’d said something right. 

“I love you too Amor, so much” Dele replied, tilted his chin down to kiss the side of Eric’s head in a brief little peck. He slid his hands under Eric’s thin t-shirt, let his palms settle flat against his skin. He let a few of Eric’s slow breaths pass before he spoke, thankful that the tears had ended for the moment. 

“You wanna have a bath? I can rub your back for you, then we can set ourselves up in bed for the day? Get some extra blankets and put a show on the telly?” Dele suggested. He noted in his mind he should make that green shake for Eric that he’d been loving recently, the nutritionists had suggested it, densely packed with vitamins and nutrients mixed with an immunity powder that they’d given to Eric when the health troubles first started. 

Eric nodded into Dele’s neck, and Dele smiled, taking it as a small win. “Was thinking could order some soup for lunch? From the Thai place? Just spend the day in bed, I’ll bring the dogs up for a cuddle too?” Dele added, hoping he wasn’t pushing it. He didn’t want Eric to feel smothered, but he had a good feeling that his boy wouldn’t mind being taken care of today. Eric nodded again and Dele felt him press a feather-light kiss to the curve of his neck. 

“Perfect rainy day” Eric whispered and Dele felt his heart settle, still terrified and uncertain about everything that lay ahead for Eric, but endlessly thankful that Eric was willing to try. That he knew he had Dele with him. Thankful that Eric hadn’t given up just yet. 

“Why don’t you stay here and stay warm for a bit longer I’ll get the bath going and let the pups up into our room yeah? Get those blankets from the linen cupboard too” Dele suggested and was happy when Eric agreed with a soft ‘yeah’ shuffled back a bit to look at Dele. 

Dele reached his hand out to cup Eric’s cheek, shuffled in close and pressed their foreheads together. “I’ve got you ok? Just relax today yeah? I promise we will get through it” Dele whispered and Eric chased the last word with a soft kiss. Dele had long given up on worrying about passing illness between them, Eric’s condition was a result of his infection post-surgery and low immune system. They slept wrapped up together, were constantly touching and Dele hadn’t gotten sick. He’d missed kissing a Eric and decided he didn’t care if he got a flu at this point, his immune system was healthy enough to fight it at least and the idea of not being able to kiss Eric till he had a completely fit bill of health was too hard. Eric needed him, and he needed Eric in all truth, they couldn’t help themselves. 

Eric pulled back from the kiss and smattered a few small kisses to Dele’s cheeks, movements slow and sluggish but sweet. “Thank you, I love you” Eric breathed, pressed his nose to Dele’s in a small nuzzle before he pulled back, looked at him with sleepy eyes. 

“Love you” Dele echoed, unable to let the sentiment go unanswered. He’d tell Eric he loved him every five minutes if he asked. 

“Stay here” Dele smiled before he climbed out of the bed, turned around in time to see Eric snuggle into bed, tugging Dele’s pillow to his chest to replace the gap Dele had left in his arms. Dele smiled and reached to tug the covers around Eric’s shoulders before he turned to head to the en-suite. He shut the door behind himself and let out a slow steadying breath, squeezed his eyes shut for a few painful moments as he tried to centre himself. He knew Eric would get better, he knew it was a matter of time, no matter how long that time was, a month, a year- that he would get better, but not the getting better hurt. Seeing Eric hurt, seeing him doubt himself, to see Eric hopeless and angry at his body’s it broke Dele’s heart. He just wanted him to catch a break, he just wanted Eric to be clear of worry and stress, not have to monitor his days carefully to ensure he didn’t push it too far. Dele wanted the Eric full of life and determination and energy, and he didn’t want it for himself, not because it was hard for him to see Eric this way, but because he knew it was breaking Eric to not Dele himself. Dele just wanted to see Eric feeling strong and passionate trusting in his own body. 

Dele sighed and walked over to the bath, turned the taps to run the water nice and hot, pressed in the plug so the bath began to fill. One step at a time, he reminded himself, one day at a time, they would get through today and then face tomorrow, it was the only way to do it. If they constantly worried about the months to come, getting through them would feel impossible. If Dele couldn’t be strong for himself, then he’d be strong for Eric, be the one he could lean on till he could stand tall on his own once more. 

Once the bath was running at the right temperature, Dele moved back to the sink and pulled out the large bag of Epsom salts they stored there. He measured out the correct amount with the scoop the bag came with and poured them into the hot water. He decided to add a bit of the calming bath soap that he's pretty sure his mum had bought for them when they first moved it. As foamy bubbles began to rest on the waters surface, Dele moved over to large windows that sat above the bath, made sure they were clicked closed to not let any cold air in and switched the shutters down to let in some of the grey morning light. It barely illuminated the room, but it was nice and soft and perfect for what Dele wanted, a nice relaxing atmosphere. 

Content with his work, Dele turned the dials of the bath down so that the water was running lighter, the bath just a bit over half full. He headed back out into the bedroom, mouth open, ready to announce to Eric his bath was ready when he saw the man sprawled out the bed. Eric was asleep once more, snoring softly with his face half mashed into Dele’s pillow, he had his phone in his hand, which lay slack on the mattress to the left of him. Only Eric would fall asleep mid text, Dele thought fondly as he walked over to the bed, took a few moments to just watch Eric breathing steadily. He would be ok, Dele told himself quietly, he had to be. 

Dele decided to give Eric a few more moments to rest and ducked back into the bathroom to turn the taps off before he headed out of the bedroom and downstairs to get the dogs. Dele smiled when he headed into the living room to see Clay and Cisco laying out on their dog beds. As soon as they spotted Dele they were up and padding over to him, nuzzling at his hip and legs to ask for pets. Dele crouched down and gave them both a scratch behind the ears, smiling when the boys tails wagged happily. 

“Hey boys, how are you? Have a good sleep?” Dele cooed, took a few more moments to cuddle with them before he headed over to their bowl, filling them up with the measured amount they needed for breakfast. Dele sat down on the floor to the left the dogs, pulled out his phone to flick through Instagram as they ate. It was something he and Eric had realised when the boys were struggling to eat, they had tried lots of ways to encourage them but they were stubborn. They had realised through a lot of trial and error that they would eat if Eric and Dele were sat with them the whole time they ate. Sometimes it was a bit annoying when they needed to get out the door, but at the end of the day it got the dogs eating right, so it was well worth it. 

When the boys finished up, Dele got up and headed over to the kitchen, the dogs following after as he grabbed a fresh bottle of water from the fridge for Eric. Dele cooed to the dogs as they made their way back upstairs, told them in a soft voice that Eric was sick and they needed to be extra nice and cheer him up. 

Once they were in the bedroom, the dogs jumped up onto the bed, began nuzzling at sleeping Eric, clearly not impressed that he wasn’t awake to see them. Dele smiled and watched as Eric stirred, blinked eyes open slowly and groggily until he realised his pets were asking him for affection. A blissful sleepy grin spread on Eric’s lips, and Dele’s heart warmed as he watched him say hello to his boys. “You still wanna bath baby?” Dele asked as he walked over to join them, sitting on the edge of the bed as Clay and Cisco moved to settle themselves at the end of the bed. Thankful they weren’t worried by the storm, and didn’t mind the thunder or lightning. Dele often joked that they got their calmness from Eric because nothing seemed to phase him either. 

“Yeah please, sounds good s’cold” Eric smiled softly and Dele reached out to smooth his hand down Eric’s cheek. “Alright, off you go I’ll be in in a second I’ll make sure the boys are good and get the bed set up” Dele leant in and pressed a firm kiss to Eric’s brow before he climbed off the bed, letting Eric easily climb out of the bed. 

Eric headed into the en-suite as Dele left the room to grab an extra few blankets from the linen closet in the hall. He laid them out over the bedspread, layered them up on top of each other until the bed with thick and cosy with soft fabrics. Dele smiled at the picture their bed made, it looked welcoming and warm and the dogs curled up on the bed just made it the perfect picture. Hopefully, this would make Eric feel better, Even just for a little while. 

Eric’s phone was still sitting unlocked on the bedside table, where he’d placed it after he climbed out of bed. Dele moves to switch it off and plug it in for him, but paused when he saw his own name on the screen, unable to help himself but read it. He trusted Eric and he knew Eric trusted him, they were open with their phones but also respected each other’s privacy, but Dele had scanned the message before he could help himself. The message was to Eric’s mum and Dele’s instinct was to read the words before he could process it.

“It’s ok, I promise, you guys don’t need to fly here and come check-in, I’m going ok. Dele is taking very good care of me, he thinks of everything, he’s so good to me. I’ll FaceTime soon love you x” 

Dele reads the message six times over before he locks the phone and places it down on the bedside table, blinks wetly as he plugs it into the charger. 

Dele often like he was flying blind a bit when he was taking care of Eric. He’d google a few home cures for the flu, like tea with honey and texted his mum asking what he could do for Eric to make him more comfortable, how he could best care for him, but still Dele worried he wasn’t doing enough. He tossed up the idea of maybe asking Eric if his parents or one of his siblings should come and stay for a while. Maybe they’d know more, maybe they would understand how to best keep Eric feeling well. Dele was trying his best for Eric but he still worried often that it wasn’t enough. 

Those words “taking very good care of me”, “he thinks of everything” echo loudly in his head, makes his eyes fill with tears. He dropped his head back and closed his eyes tight, took a slow breath in and held it, had to pause and give himself a moment. He loved Eric so much his chest might actually burst apart with it. 

Dele shivered and felt a smile take over his face, pressed his fist to his mouth as took a moment before he settled. 

“Del? You comin’ in?” Eric’s voice floated out from the bathroom and Dele quickly wiped away his tears, swallowed hard and tried to hide the love stupid smile on his face as he walked over to the bathroom. 

“Yeah Eric, I’m coming I’m coming” Dele smiled, stripped out of his clothing quickly, dropped the items to the floor carelessly as he stepped into the en-suite, now naked. 

Eric let out a soft wolf whistle, the sound reverberated in the bathroom and Dele flushed pink, rolled his eyes and tried to play it off with a roll of his eyes and a sharp set of his mouth. “Shut up” he huffed, eyes on Eric who looked sweet like this, sat among the thick bubbles of the bath, steam floated up around him and the soft light make him look like something out of a movie, something ethereal, something too precious to belong to earth. 

“Come here” Eric asked again, sat up in the tub with enough room behind him for Dele to fit in perfectly. Dele was quick to take his designated place, stepped into the hot water and felt tingles run up his legs at the feeling of them being submerged in the heat. He fit himself in behind Eric and as soon as he was sat down, Eric laid back into his chest, the water lapped at their chests with the movement. 

Eric seemed to properly settle then, his breathing settled into a steady rhythm and slowed, Dele able to follow the slow inhale and exhale from where his arms were wrapped around his waist. “You put fragrance in here?” Eric asked, his voice sleepy and warm, soft under the loud clap of thunder that sounded overhead. 

“Mhm, that’s the bubbles, it’s a lavender soap thing that mum gave me ages ago” Dele answered, turned his head to press a small kiss to the skin above Eric’s ear, nuzzled his nose in and closed his eyes. 

“Smells good” Eric muttered, his hands came to find Dele’s hands tangling together under the water in a familiar motion. “Way better than the muscle rub stuff from the physios” Dele agreed, words mumbled into Erics skin. He felt Eric’s stomach jump in a small laugh and he couldn’t help but smile, kissed Erics skin again. 

“You wanna watch the new season of big mouth? Haz said it was good, proper funny” Dele suggested and Eric nodded, tilted his head back to rest against Dele’s shoulder, the spikes of his hair tickling his skin. 

“The boys eat?” Eric asked, moved his and Dele’s tangled hands across some of the bubbles. “Mmhm, they did, all of it” Dele replied, tugged their hands up to his mouth to kiss the back of Eric’s hand. 

They sat curled close for a few slow moments, chatting about babysitting Eric’s baby cousins next week, about trying the new kind of powdered protein the nutritionists mentioned, if Eric’s brother was still seeing that girl. About nothing and everything until they had to let some of the water out and refill the bath with more hot water, both not ready to climb out into the cool air of the home. 

It’s been quiet for a few moments, Dele can feel his eyes getting heavier when he remembers that he’d offered Eric a massage earlier, untangled their hands and ignored Eric’s soft sound of annoyance at the gesture to instead place his hands on Eric’s shoulders. 

“Sit forward bub” Dele spoke softly, pushed gently as Eric sat up, snuffled back in the tub so he could reach his back properly. 

Dele gathered some of the soapy suds in his hands and dropped them on top of Eric’s shoulders, let them melt into his skin under his touch as he ran his hands down the length of Eric’s back with pressure. He dug his fingers into Eric’s lower back and began to rub gently. Dele slowly worked over the entire length of Eric’s back, each line and bulge of muscle, folded his hand into a fist and dug his knuckles into the pressure between his shoulder blades. 

Dele worked over Eric’s back until the man was completely relaxed, leaning back into every touch and press, let out small breaths and grunts when Dele pushed anywhere particularly tender, the occasional moan that Dele had to work to ignore. 

Eric yawned heavily and Dele leant in to press a kiss to Eric’s shoulder, moved his hands to Eric’s sides and squeezed gently. “Come on baby, let's get out” Dele whispered, kissed the back of Eric’s head and climbed up out of the bath, moved to grab them fresh towels as Eric followed after him. 

The soft thick towels were freshly washed and he unfolded one for himself, quickly secured it around his waist with a twist at the hip, before he unravelled Eric’s. Dele walked over to Eric and wrapped the towel around his shoulders, tugged him into his arms. Eric’s hands fell to Dele’s towel, held the material as he leant in to kiss Dele in three soft pecks. “Thank you baby” he muttered and Dele just beamed, tucked a kiss to Eric’s cheek before he pulled away. 

Once they had dried off, they changed into fresh sweats and climbed back into bed, Eric lying between Dele’s legs as they had been in the bath. Eric had taken Dele’s hand that wasn't using the remote in his own almost immediately, tucked their joined hands into the pocket in the front of his hoodie. It was stupidly cute and Dele wanted to take a photo of it, but he didn't want to disrupt Eric, or by any means make him feel like he should stop what he was doing. 

Dele started Big Mouth on the TV and laid back into the bed, clocked in his mind that he should order their food after the first episode, head downstairs and make Eric his green drink when the food was almost here. Eric’s skin was seemingly less clammy after the bath and Dele would make sure to check his temperature properly if he started to feel overheated again, give him some paracetamol if it was sitting high. 

He felt Eric laugh at the TV show, heard his soft giggle and cuddled him tighter into his body, let himself focus on Eric’s slow breaths and the feeling of his body warm against his own, a firm weight on top Dele. Maybe they would be ok, maybe Dele did know how to best take care of Eric, maybe even on the bad days, if they could have even a few good hours, things would be alright in the long run.


End file.
